Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize