I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
