Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
