yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
