C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
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I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
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You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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