I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
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