He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
