Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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