the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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