would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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