Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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