I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
