who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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