Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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