I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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