no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
