So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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