I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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