we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
