We're like a lot better than the average bears
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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