before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
