Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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