so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize