Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
