Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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