tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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