It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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