Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
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