I don't remember. Are we still dating?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
