Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
