I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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