Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
