please come you make the beer taste better
stop calling my apartment porn island.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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