It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
you didnt know i had herpes?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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