New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
