Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
