i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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