my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize