Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
