I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
