I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize