u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
organizing the empties. That sober.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
