youre lurking in front of me
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
