I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
