these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
