Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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