Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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