the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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