I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
What happened to fro yo and sex?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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