i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
