do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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